nice knowing you
18 November 2008
Time Warner is (allegedly) coming to connect my apartment to the outside world this afternoon. I don’t think this bodes well for my social life, considering how hard it’s been over the last 18 days to step outside the place and that was before I had access to constant House and Law & Order viewings. I can only imagine what a reclusive loser I’ll be once I Behold The Power of HD DVR, which Jordan claims is going to change my life. Does Gossip Girl even come in HD?
You know when people have blogs that are cool and then they have a baby, and all of the sudden all they do is talk about the baby? I’m not saying that they become LESS cool, just that it becomes very baby- centric? That’s how I’m about to get with this apartment. Particularly once I can stop stealing spotty internet connections from my neighbors and get a connection that allows me to move furniture two inches, take a picture of it, and then put the picture on the internet and ask people what they think of the rearrangement. FOR EXAMPLE:
Here’s my fake fireplace. (That is, however, real wood next to it. It was there when I moved in, but I’m totally into it, so it stays). This is down at the end of my living room that connects to my kitchen (near where, as you can see, the Bastard Turtles will live once I bring them in from NJ. I brought their spare tank in already because I think I’m going to have to separate them once they arrive in the 11232 to keep them from starting a gang war).
Since getting everything set up, I’ve become consumed with what to do with the space in front of the fake fireplace. I can only think of one answer– get a fake bearskin rug.
I know that this is hilarious NOW– but for how long will this continue to be hilarious? I’m tempted to say “forever.” Whenever I near a moment where I think it’s not hilarious anymore, I can always light the candles in my fake fireplace and lay on my fake bearskin rug in my underwear and pretend I’m in a bad ski lodge porno or something, and it will instantly become even more hilarious than before. Right? Thoughts?
5 Responses to “nice knowing you”
November 18th, 2008 at 1:47 pm
gossip girl DOES come in HD! we learned this yesterday. it was beautiful.
November 18th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
I think very highly of you because you come up with ideas such as this one. I will think less of you if you decide not to execute on it.
November 18th, 2008 at 10:13 pm
Gossip Girl is the only show that should come in HD, because all of its stars are dewy 11-year-olds. Except for Planet Earth, obviously.
The fake bearskin rug is an awesome idea.
November 19th, 2008 at 10:28 am
I’m about 85% sold on the bearskin rug idea. Every time I look at that part of the floor something just seems missing. I think I need it.
November 19th, 2008 at 4:04 pm
The bear rug is also weirdly adoreable. Consider also the potential for Christmas cards when one has a fake fireplace and fake bearskin rug. Get yourself a fake baby and you’re all set.